Who Asked? But Does Anyone Really Need To Ask?: Discouragement of Self-Expression Among Gen Z

“Who?” 

Oh, me and my friends went to the cinema on Fri- 

“Who asked?”

Being met with some variation of these exact words almost seems like a universal experience for many while talking about something that excites us or brings us joy. I am no stranger to the feeling of defeat and mild embarrassment that comes with being shut down while talking about something I care about.

As one of, if not the, most expressive generations, it is quite ironic how Gen Z finds themselves spiraling deeper into the wormhole of hiding who they are in fear of being judged by others. But this phenomenon didn’t happen overnight: different individuals express themselves in unique ways; for some, it's through altering their physical appearance; for others (like me), it's conveying the retellings of my stories and adventures to people I care about. The ‘Who asked’ joke gets old pretty quickly, and when it does, it may evolve into something much deeper than the harmless joke it originally started as.

This phrase has been around a lot longer than we think, but with the ever-increasing amount of users on social media platforms these days, it's no wonder that the use of ‘Who asked?’ as an insult has spread like wildfire. Furthermore, the trend contributes heavily to the pre-existing hostility of societal norms. In the modern era, self-expression amongst people, regardless of their interests, should be encouraged instead of the opposite.

As a generation that heavily emphasizes the importance of individuality and the concept of a ‘true you,’ we often find ourselves getting shamed for wanting to show the world the version of us that has only seen the walls of our bedrooms. After all, the world wouldn't be nearly as fun if we all managed to cram ourselves into the expectations of an ever-changing society successfully. The suppression of self-expression is a societal issue, not just a personal one. It reflects a culture that often values conformity over individuality, leading to far-reaching consequences. When we’re afraid to express ourselves, we are less likely to take risks, pursue our dreams, or challenge societal norms. This significantly increases the chances of developing issues with mental health under the pressure to fit into the box that society has laid out for us. 

Self-suppression may seem to be a modern invention of social media. However, this phenomenon has been around for much longer. For ladies in the Edwardian and Victorian eras, even expressing their non-conforming desires was strictly forbidden. Interests in horse riding and going off to college were encouraged to be replaced with those of needlepoint and homemaking. The ability to feel comfortable in your own skin while doing the things that feel best for you is something that every human deserves.

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Gen Z and their open-mindedness have opened a new door of acceptance and inclusivity for many communities and minorities that have suffered discrimination in the past. Yet, people still struggle with expressing themselves in fear of being rejected or made fun of by the people surrounding them. Judgment isn't always straightforward. It can be passed in subtle comments scattered throughout seemingly normal conversations. Most of the time, these comments come from the people closest to you.

People will judge whether or not you fit into their standards of perfection. If that’s the case, then it’s better to be who you truly are instead of attempting to please everyone. Despite the progress we have made with being able to openly be ourselves without getting disrespected, we still have a long way to go in terms of being accepted by the people around us to create a diverse and welcoming environment for future generations.